Kroncler an Die-uhrist, Bruno Kneebreaker Vizzini.
Bookd passej on a ship, The Orfend Owl…or somethin like dat. Y name a bote? Du farmers name ther wagons? The kaptin semed a bit shady an nervus, but its tha first bote I cude find goin to Travain. As always kepin mi ize opin. We sale tomarro.
4 daes out, so far uneventful. I sene dis Halfling wat got a maHes always got it opin, just like Dexter an Alue did. Stranj.
I se tha Artefact:
Next dae, I herd tha Halfling tawkin with a Dragonborn. He wuz spewin krap bowt tha map an wher he got it. I introdused miself. His story chanjd severol times. [Insert starting story here.]
Halfling: Kwin [insert description and background story here.] I doent bi it. kepe an i on him. Wons agin a Hafling tels a tale, an thers theft, gamblin, decete involvd. An hes li-in. Grayt. Note he refuses to giv his ful name. Staireo tippical.
Dragonborn: Drakkin-Korrin [insert description.] Semes alrite, perhaps on tha up an uA littel to hi brow an nobelish for mi tayst. Thinks hes better than u cos hes taller, u noe the tipe. Folloes Bahamut, Dragon Lord.
Hardn Thick Longshaft: [insert description and story.] Doent bend over aroun dis gi!! Its od dat som won with his talents- tracker an gide- wude just happen to b on bord. But he doz look like a Longshaft member. An he clames to noe Hadda Cockinmihan an others. He clames to noe Dexter an sez he is lookin fer tha Ta’Hiite women. Thers a chanse dis is an elabborit story to hide his sortd past. But…
To menny ov owr story lines overlap fer dis to b any thin but fate.
Dae 6, 7 or 8: Krew on dek racin aroun. We saw tha sayls of 3 ships ahind us. Kaptin (Notgunna) Matder is a pirit. Wuz karreen kontraband. Also kild a gi. Then he wuz “nic” enuf to poot us in a longbote. Kwin wanted to git his monny bak. Drakin drue weppin. I got off tha big bote, an on tha long bote. We al did. Sum muto roed us ashor. Ther wuz dis butefful beech hows. Inside wuz Walon, a grizzeld ol man. He trikd us into karreen his books to Belhmut.
Tha sitty of Belhmut wuz huje, but weerd. Gards every wher, exsept wher ther neded. Terns out, Walon wuz a teecher at ther Maje Skool. He introdused us to his frend, Lord Zan Flaymtung- a hi nobel Dragonborn ov Rahns rulin klas .
Tha sitty had a weerd affect on Kwin. He started actin al Kendish. He b gan stelin mi things an reternin em. Dis continude later in tha jerny to. Altho he clamed a dislike fer stelin an pepol wat stele, tha Paladin Drakkin-Korrin sed nothin. Mae hap hes reservd, an wachin Kwins acshuns. Sorta watin to make shur b for passin jujment.
Tha Lord xtorted us to take a job- as kairavan gards. We wer to transport a Pelor preest, sum gudes an wares, an kepe a driver from gittn bomd. We faled to stop tha drunkerd. He raced off an krashd his wagin. Then big bugs attakd us. We servived, beerly.
We reechd tha town. Ther majic werd poll wuz nockd down. And thay wer hidin from sum chicken theves. Wat a bunch of chickens. Otta tha gude-nes ov owr harts, an peer disgust fer these kowerds- we deside to take kair ov tha feersum, horribol chicken theves. We trackt em north to a cave dat stinks like chicken pupe. Inside we mete and bete severol kobotes. Mor ar cummin down tha tunnels.